Writing thank you cards is an important final stage of your wedding responsibilities, and it should be an enjoyable time of gratitude as you reflect on all the support you and your spouse have enjoyed throughout your lives and while planning the wedding. When writing thank yous, many people grab a guest list to work from and leave it at that, but it’s a good idea to send thank you cards to people beyond your guest list. Who should you include? Let’s break it down!
A full list of family members of both you and your partner is the perfect starting point for your thank you cards. Split the list into households so you know exactly how many cards you need to write, but keep in mind that you might want to write individual cards for some people within a household (for example, separate cards for your sister and your parents). Remember to think about family members who didn’t attend the wedding as well as those that did: perhaps they live too far away or had another important event and couldn’t make it. Receiving a thank you card and a photo from the day will help them feel included.
Your list should include any family members you are on good terms with, including:
Aunts and uncles
Nieces and nephews
Thank them for their love and support during the wedding and throughout your whole life. Feel free to share happy memories with them and tell them how much they mean to you.
Your bridal party puts in so much work for you during the wedding planning process, that they deserve a huge thank you at the end. You might choose to use a specific ‘thanks for being my bridesmaid’ / ‘thanks for being my groomsman’ card, or you can simply leave an extra personal note in one of your normal thank you cards. Either way, it’s common to give your bridal party a thank you gift in addition to a thank you card to recognise all their help, love and hard work.
This is where most people put their focus when writing their thank you cards: grab your guest list and make sure everyone who was present on the day gets a thank you note. If there were uninvited people that showed up on the day to have a peek at the ceremony, you might want to send them a thank you card as well to acknowledge their presence and support.
When writing to wedding guests, always acknowledge that they were there on the day, thank them for anything they helped with at the wedding or in the lead up to it, and say thank you for any wedding gift or card they gave you.
Your friendship network typically stretches well beyond the number of people you are able to invite to your wedding, so your wedding thank you cards should too! You don’t need to send thank yous to everyone you’ve ever known, of course, but friends who have played an important role in your life should be included. If you were considering inviting them to your wedding, it might be a good idea to send a card. If you became friends after your guest list was already written but would include them on the list if you were writing it now, include them in the thank you cards. If they’re your parents friends who you see a lot but aren’t personally close with, consider including them too.
At the very least, friends should be sent a thank you card if they sent you a card or a gift during your engagement. Anything beyond that is your call, but it’s always a good idea to take the opportunity to thank people who have been part of your support network.
It’s easy to forget about wedding vendors when writing your thank you cards. Technically they’re doing their job, so you don’t have to say thanks, right? Well, maybe technically, but it’s also polite to say ‘thanks’ when a waitress brings you your meal at a restaurant. There are two ways of getting your vendors a thank you card: you can deliver their money in a thank you card (just one reason that it’s a good idea to order your thank you cards ahead of the big day!), or you can wait until after the wedding and send a follow up thank you card separate from the payment. This is especially worthwhile for vendors who made a huge difference to your day or whose work you loved.
An extra tip: If you find yourself writing a kind thank you card to a vendor, take the time to leave similar feedback on their website, Facebook page or on review sites. Positive public feedback is the best thank you gift you could give your vendors. But you can still send the card for a personal touch!
Taking the time to think about all these categories will help ensure you cover all your bases and thank everyone you need to thank. This makes everyone feel included and lets you finish your wedding with style and class.
This post was sponsored by Paperlust, but as always, all opinions are our own.
This was a guest post by Maddison Wallace from Paperlust. Maddison is head of content at Paperlust. She is a communications professional, postgrad student, part-time librarian, and occasional wedding photographer. She loves words and drinking cups of tea.