There's a lot of hearsay out there about the wedding industry. You've probably heard some of it-- that vendors charge more once they hear the word 'wedding', that people are out to rip you off, that someone else can do it for less, so why not hire them? We're here to put some of these wedding myths to bed. Because the last thing you need when planning your wedding is tons of confusing hearsay!
1. Wedding pros will mark up the cost of something once they hear the word 'wedding'. We hear this one a TON. While there are always a few bad apples out there that create rumors like this, as a general rule, this simply isn't true. Whether you're talking about a cake, flowers, or any service a wedding professional provides-- it doesn't cost more just because it's a wedding and we can charge whatever we want. It *may* cost more because weddings require more expertise, time and effort than other events. Or it may cost the same as other events. It just depends! If your wedding cake for 300 costs more than your graduate cake for 300, it's probably because it required WAY different decor, ingredients, time and effort. Not because we're out to rip you off. I PROMISE.
2. That all vendors are created equal, so if someone can do it for less.... Another one we hear all the time. "Well so-and-so quoted me $60 for makeup, so why are you $150?" Probably because of portfolio, expertise, demand, and time! You are always welcome to pay less for something if you find it elsewhere. No one is forcing you to pay price B vs price A. But remember, you almost always get what you pay for, and there's almost always a reason person B is more than person A. Not that there's anything wrong with either! It's just a matter of determining what's most important to you in your budget. Don't try to cut corners on a category that's hugely important to you, because you will regret it.
3. That DIY will save you tons of time and money. If you're going to DIY something for your wedding, it should be because you love the project and want that something to have a personalized touch. NOT because you think it's going to save you tons of time and money. It never does. Do you really want to be glueing 200 tiny flowers into menus the night before your wedding? We didn't think so. Pick a few projects to give your day a personalized touch (if that's your thing! You don't have to do any DIY if you don't want to), and leave the rest to the professionals. Not only do the materials for a DIY project rarely save you as much as you think, but your time is valuable too!
4. That You HAVE to do any certain thing. There are tons of wedding traditions out there that people will be adamant you HAVE to do. Aunt Judy says you HAVE to have a first dance. Mom says you HAVE to cut a cake, not a pie. You don't HAVE to do anything. It's your wedding! It should reflect who you two are as a couple. The only thing you HAVE to do is enjoy your day the way you've envisioned it. Don't let anyone pressure you otherwise.
5. That your photographer can just 'Photoshop that out'. Yes, photographers can use Photoshop. No, that doesn't mean your Aunt Judy that was no where to be found during family portraits can just be photoshopped in, or that they can magically make you look 20 pounds lighter, or fix that sunburnt tan line on your back. They're using Photoshop, not a Harry Potter wand. They can adjust minor tweaks and fixes, but not change a photo entirely. And why would you want them to, anyway?
6. That you really don't need a wedding planner. We know this might not be in everyone's budget. But we will never stop advocating for at LEAST a month of wedding coordinator, for your own sake. If you truly want to enjoy your day stress free, hire someone to manage it. And no, a venue coordinator is not the same thing.
7. That it's the bride's day. It is! But it's also the groom's day. Or the other bride's day. And your parents day. And about the 150 guests that traveled across the world to come celebrate. Don't forget about them. Consider guest comfort. Make sure to include your parents. Ask your fiancee for input and help. Don't assume they don't care and it's all about you and what you want. It's a joint effort, and a joint celebration!
8. That every moment will be pure magic. Real life happens. The day overall will be magic! But don't get too hung up on making sure every single second is pure Disney. Sometimes it rains. Sometimes you forget that special bottle of champagne at your house. Sometimes the flower girl cries. All you can do is laugh. Those are the best memories, anyway. Take some pressure of yourself and allow life to happen without getting your undies in a bunch. It'll all end up beautifully.
9. You have to control and pay attention to every single detail. Again, this is totally your call. If you like managing every single aspect of your day, great! But don't feel like you have to, or else it'll be a disaster. If you don't want to delegate, don't. If you don't care about having 75 special framed photos of you and bae at your reception, don't bother. If you don't care about cutting the cake and just want to open the dessert bar after dinner, do it. Let go of the things that don't matter to you, and focus on what does. Just because Mom says you MUST consider a hand written welcome sign at the entryway because your sister did, doesn't mean your day will suck if you opt for passing.
10. The planning process is STRESSFUL. Yes, it can be at times. But it doesn't have to be! Hire great vendors, and trust them. Give yourself grace, and involve your loved ones if that makes it easier. Stay organized and prioritize. Breathe, breathe, breathe. It really does all come together. At the end of the day, you'll be married, and that's what really matters!